Meet Myriam
Bidaud Ksikes

As a certified professional in couples psychotherapy and coaching, I have completed extensive training and acquired the essential qualifications to offer expert guidance and support to my clients. Understanding the importance of continual professional development, I am committed to lifelong learning. I actively keep abreast of the latest research and methodologies in relationships psychotherapy and coaching, ensuring that I integrate cutting-edge advances and knowledge into my daily practice. This dedication allows me to provide not just effective, but also state-of-the-art and comprehensive support tailored to meet your unique needs.

As a Gestalt Therapist, I have been first trained in Systemic Gestalt Therapy approach designed for couples. During our Intensives Couples work, you will embark on a journey to enhance your relationship through a series of transformative experiences. I will guide you through techniques that foster deep communication and understanding between you and your partner. You will engage in exercises like role-playing and the empty chair technique, which are designed to help you express and process your feelings in a safe and supportive environment.

During the Intensive, you will learn to observe and understand the patterns that define your interactions. By focusing on the here and now, you will gain insights into both your behavior and that of your partner, enhancing empathy and emotional connection.

As we work together, you will develop new ways to approach conflicts and challenges, leading to healthier and more satisfying interactions.

You will also explore how your individual backgrounds influence your relationship. This understanding will empower you to break free from recurring issues and foster a renewed sense of partnership. Through our work together in Systemic Gestalt Therapy, you will not only address immediate concerns but also lay the groundwork for long-term growth and fulfillment in your relationship.

As a Relational Life Therapy (RLT) practitioner, I am dedicated to guiding you through a transformative journey to enhance and deepen your relationship. RLT, developed by Terry Real, is a powerful approach that moves beyond traditional couples therapy/coaching methods to quickly address and heal relational issues, helping you and your partner achieve greater intimacy and understanding.

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Here’s how I will support you in our RLT sessions:

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1. Waking Up: We will begin by openly addressing the negative patterns in your relationship. I will provide direct, yet compassionate, feedback to help you both see how certain behaviors are damaging your bond. This step is crucial for setting the stage for genuine change.

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2. Healing and Transformation: Together, we will explore the deep-seated issues that trigger these behaviors, often rooted in past trauma. By conducting this exploration in a shared space with your partner present, it not only deepens the healing process but also enhances mutual understanding and empathy within your relationship.

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3. Relational Skills for Life: Finally, I will equip you with practical skills and tools to continue nurturing and strengthening your relationship long-term. These skills include practicing accountability, enhancing vulnerability, and fostering empathy—key components that contribute to a healthy and enduring partnership.

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Through RLT, you will learn to approach your relationship with a new perspective, embracing honesty and openness that can lead to profound emotional connections. 

By working with me using RLT methodology, you will not only address immediate concerns but also lay the groundwork for lasting relational success. This approach is about transforming your relationship dynamics, helping you both grow together in a supportive and loving environment. 

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* TWO DAYS COUPLES INTENSIVES *

In my practice, I incorporate Relational Life Therapy (RLT) into Intensive Two-day Therapy/Coaching sessions, which are designed to dramatically accelerate the process of relationship transformation and healing. This approach is based on Terry Real's principles, focusing on deep relational work within a compact timeframe.

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During these intensive sessions, we will delve deeply into the core patterns and conflicts of your relationship.

The process starts with identifying and addressing negative relational patterns through direct feedback and compassionate confrontation. This sets the stage for profound insights and emotional processing.

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The intensive format allows us to continuously engage in the therapeutic process without the breaks typical in weekly therapy sessions. This helps maintain the emotional momentum and depth, facilitating significant breakthroughs in understanding and empathy. We will explore deep-seated issues and traumas affecting the relationship, with both partners present, which enhances the healing process and promotes mutual empathy.

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Throughout the two days, we will also focus on building relational skills that are vital for a healthy relationship. This includes practicing accountability, vulnerability, and empathy, all aimed at fostering a stronger, more resilient partnership. The goal is to not only address immediate relational challenges but also to equip you with the tools and understanding necessary for long-term relational success. By the end of the intensive, you should have a clearer path forward and practical strategies to maintain and deepen your connection.

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Intensives like these are known for their efficacy in creating rapid changes and deeper connections within relationships, supported by focused and sustained therapeutic work.

As a practitioner of the Gottman Method in couples therapy and coaching, I use during the Couples Intensives a structured and evidence-based approach to help you and your partner build a stronger, more resilient relationship. Developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman, this method is renowned for its effectiveness, rooted in over four decades of research observing couples' interactions and dynamics.

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Here’s how I will guide you through the Gottman Method:

1. Thorough Assessment: We begin with a detailed evaluation of your relationship's dynamics. This includes discussing your history, goals, and completing specific questionnaires when necessary. This helps identify the specific areas of your relationship that need attention and sets the baseline for our work together.

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2. Focused Interventions during our Intensive: Based on the Sound Relationship House Theory, we work on critical areas such as:
   - Building Love Maps: Enhancing your understanding of each other’s world.
   - Sharing Fondness and Admiration: Increasing respect and appreciation.
   - Turning Towards Instead of Away: Responding positively to each other’s bids for attention.
   - Managing Conflict: Learning to handle disagreements constructively.
   - Creating Shared Meaning: Developing rituals of connection and shared goals.

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3. Applying Practical Tools: You'll learn practical techniques to improve your daily interactions and manage conflicts more effectively. This includes learning to recognize and combat the "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse" (Criticism, Defensiveness, Contempt, and Stonewalling), which are predictors of relationship breakdown.

As a practitioner of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), developed by Dr. Sue Johnson, I integrate this highly effective approach with other emotional therapies in intensive couple therapy sessions. EFT is rooted in attachment theory, focusing on the emotional connections that are central to fostering secure, resilient relationships. This method is particularly beneficial for exploring deep emotional currents that underlie behavior patterns, often revealing primary emotions like fear or sadness that drive reactions such as anger or withdrawal.

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I will guide you through the EFT process, actively engaging with you, using interventions that focus not only on reducing distress but also on fostering a deep sense of connection between you two :

1. Assessment and De-escalation: Initially, we will focus on understanding the patterns in your relationship that lead to distress. By identifying these patterns, we aim to reduce negative interactions and stabilize your emotional responses, creating a safer space for both partners.

2. Restructuring Interactions: As we progress, the therapy aims to reshape emotional experiences and interaction patterns. This involves creating and practicing new, healthier ways to relate to each other. You’ll learn to express underlying needs and fears without conflict, enhancing mutual understanding and support.

3. Consolidation and Integration: Later, we'll reinforce new patterns and secure emotional bonds. This stage focuses on applying what you’ve learned to various aspects of your relationship, ensuring that you can support each other effectively even when faced with challenges.

In intensive therapy settings, where the goal is to achieve significant breakthroughs in a condensed period, the combination of EFT with other emotional therapies proves invaluable. Techniques such as guided imagery, role-playing, and direct expression of feelings are utilized to help partners access and articulate their deeper emotions in a safe environment. This process not only aids in understanding one another's inner emotional landscape but also helps in effectively managing emotional responses, crucial for maintaining relationship stability and intimacy.

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Furthermore, these intensive sessions emphasize creating a secure emotional space where both partners can express vulnerabilities without fear of judgment or rejection. This safety is essential for fostering intimacy and trust, allowing partners to engage in healing interactions that can transform the relationship's emotional foundation.

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By integrating EFT with additional emotional therapies, I aim to accelerate the healing process, providing couples with the tools to manage their emotions and enhance their connection. This approach doesn't just alleviate symptoms of distress but fundamentally changes the emotional dynamics between partners, leading to lasting and meaningful improvements in their relationship. Through intensive therapy, couples can achieve months' worth of therapy in just a 2 days, making substantial gains in relationship satisfaction and reducing overall distress.

In my practice, I integrate trauma-informed therapy into intensive couple’s therapy, recognizing the profound impact that individual and shared trauma can have on relationships. This approach is grounded in understanding that behaviors and emotional responses within a relationship often stem from childhood and past experiences, and by addressing these root causes, we can foster deeper healing and connection between partners.

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Here’s how I support couples through trauma work :

1. Establishing Safety and Stabilization: The first phase of trauma work in couples therapy involves creating a safe and stable environment where both partners feel secure to express their emotions and vulnerabilities. This setting allows for emotional regulation and lays the groundwork for deeper therapeutic work.

2. Understanding and Processing Trauma: In this phase, we explore the trauma each partner brings into the relationship. We delve into how these past experiences influence current interactions and relational dynamics. By understanding the ‘whys’ and 'hows' behind behaviors and emotional reactions, couples can start to see each other in a new light, paving the way for empathy and compassion.

3. Rebuilding and Strengthening the Relationship: The final stage focuses on applying new understanding and emotional insights into everyday interactions. Couples learn to replace old patterns with healthier coping strategies and communication skills. This not only helps in healing from past wounds but also strengthens the relationship against future stresses.

By including trauma work in couples intensive therapy and coaching, we not only work towards healing the pain but also transform the relationship into a source of strength and mutual growth. This method shows respect for each partner’s process and recognizes the deep-seated origins of emotional responses, which is crucial for true recovery and building a lasting bond​

In my specialized intensive couple therapy sessions, I employ Attachment Theory as it is integral to understanding adult love and relationships, posits that the quality of our early attachments profoundly influences our later relationships.

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Here’s how I incorporate Attachment Theory in a two-day intensive therapy session:

1. Understanding Attachment Styles: Identifying each partner’s attachment style—secure, anxious, avoidant or disorganised. Understanding these styles helps explain how each partner approaches intimacy and dependency. This awareness is crucial for understanding behaviors that may otherwise be perceived as confusing or frustrating.

2. Addressing Attachment Injuries: During our intensive sessions, we focus on significant moments that have damaged trust, known as attachment injuries. These can be past betrayals or disappointments that have led to ongoing insecurity and conflict. We work to process these injuries, understand their impact, and start healing.

3. Enhancing Emotional Attunement: Through various exercises, I help couples become more emotionally attuned to each other. This involves improving how partners read each other's emotional cues and respond empathetically. Enhancing attunement helps to strengthen the bond and improve relationship satisfaction.

4. Creating a Secure Base: The goal of using Attachment Theory in therapy is to help partners create a relationship that feels like a secure base from which both can thrive. We work on strategies to increase each partner's sense of security within the relationship, which promotes greater independence and exploration.

5. Intensive Interaction Work: Given the condensed nature of a two-day intensive session, we dive deep into interactive exercises designed to reshape the couple’s interaction patterns. This intensive work allows for immediate practice and feedback in a controlled, therapeutic environment, accelerating the couple’s growth and understanding.

In my two-day intensive couple therapy sessions, I emphasize the use of Imago Relationship Therapy, specifically focusing on implementing Imago Dialogues as a new routine for couples to continue after our work together. This method, rooted in the insights developed by Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt, prioritizes structured communication to deepen understanding and empathy.

During our sessions, couples learn to practice these dialogues, which involve expressing their feelings and needs in a safe, structured environment, enabling each partner to respond with empathy and validation. The goal is to make these dialogues a regular part of the couple's interaction, transforming their communication patterns and fostering a lasting, supportive bond.